I looked at all the caged animals in the shelter…the cast-offs of human society.I saw in their eyes love and hope, fear and dread, sadness and betrayal. And I was angry.’God,’ I said, ‘this is terrible! Why don’t you do something?’God was silent for a moment, and then He spoke softly. ‘I have done something,’ He replied. ‘I created YOU.’”- Jim Willis
Merry Christmas 2008
Hello all and Merry Christmas to all! I actually DID send out ‘my version’ of Christmas cards (via e-mail) and I hope all my friends and family got them! If I forgot anyone.. Check your spam / junk mail folders THEN write me and let me know that I mussed up your e-mail addy & send me the corrections.
Christmas Thoughts:
Well, Christmas seems to get more and more lackluster, I remember when I Loved to decorate, and wrap, and all the little presentation things that one fills their holiday and space with.. and now, it sees like such an under appreciated chore. Was it that I stopped appreciating, or let myself get too busy to care, lost my ’space’, or that others seemed to lose the appreciation and awe so.. it uninspired me. So much to do over holidays, and so much on my mind……Anyway, I have wished the last couple of years that we decorated more, and made a bigger deal of Christmas, had more spirit, but we didn’t.
I did go to Family’s on Christmas Eve, and got to see my cousins, and my aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews.. some like me, some don’t, some think they are better than everyone (i got sneered at when i collected cans from the trash to RECYCLE.. WWHHAAAATT?!?!?) but I could care less. I went to see my family, good bad or ugly. Because you never know when it will be the last time you see them, and when it comes to family, I am all about no regrets.
For Christmas I got myself the gift of Organization. I got me a cute little Blackberry curve (used an upgrade so I ended up paying less than 1/2 price than what it was.. cuz am CHEAP 
). I STILL haven’t imported my phone numbers over ( seems I have to go to a Verizon store to port them over (grrr) because I can’t just transfer them from my enV.. and the reason this bothers me.. well.. thank you all for the Christmas wishes. and i had to look EVERYONE up.. *sigh* just kidding. I Love my Blackberry already though, but kind of wish there was an easier way to add the addresses and information I need. Of course there may be, I just didn’t read the manual.:))
ANYHOO back to my Lifetime movies, and Wine.. hope everyone is having or had a safe and Merry Christmas!!
My B Day..almost
Tis the darn season.. I am getting another year older, oh yay.. and am wondering where all my well laid plans.. more like my ‘well imagined hopes’ for my life have taken me.. I guess I can currently envision myself as a construction zone right now.. still..I’m awesome..(do you have any IDEA how long it has taken me to build up to such confidence?)
Upon recap of my 34th year, I detail some of my finer accomplishments..
In January, I started as a temp at Princess cruises.. which i was skeptical about because of all the bad lipservice I had heard.. of course.. me being the contrary woman I am..I LOVED it ..
June- I was hired on as a permanent Princess employee YAY!!! A full time permanent job with benefits , and people I like, and a company I like, and yay!!
August-health benefits Kat’s 80’s b day party
September- some time during this month i decided i REALLY need to start dating. Really.. I mean, it may be too many steamy romance novels, orit may be the fact I have been single a
October-I met Emily my daughter’s psychotic friend. and wow. She is a little something ’special’..Halloween was good.. did the Lombardi ranch thing with my kids & my sister’s kids.. it was good.. Halloween night, it was dark & quiet, went to the neighbors house again, and hung out with them.. I hadn’t for a while, and actually really missed them, her 1 year sobriety is in Dec, and I could not be more proud of her, seriously, she is a trooper, and had to face a lot to get to where she is..Kudos Karen!
Nov- I finally had my endoscopic sinus surgery, AHHHHHH.. AIR… breathing good….Had to make an emergency trip to Hollyweird to get my daughter and the Blob.. I mean ‘EMILY’s’ Twilight tour tickets.. Yah if my girl didnt rock so much.. she would have had NO chance!GOD i LOVE my kids!!speaking of.. The day before Thanksgiving, the kids’ dad & I had a mediation in Santa Monica, and came to a partial agreement on some custody changes. It is a work in progress but at least it has progressed..I ‘hosted’ thanksgiving dinner at the house, which I consider a success, because the house didn’t burn down, there were no family tussles, Sis & I shopped with the girls, came back & she did most cooking while I did the cleaning, and some cooking.. as a bonus..I got to hang out with my sister (and drink 2 bottles of wine).
Bringing us to December.. aahhh the sweet smell of December.. I think..started off with a sniffle..went to Kaiser for an asthma attack, and found out I had bronchitis..um.. OOOKKKAAYYY.. LOVE my pain tolerence (sarcasm).. so out of work a few days.. then the 6th went to visit my FIRST EVER PRINCESS CRUISE SHIP.. the Sapphire Princess.. can we say Beautiful? I have been on a Carnival ship, that was beautiful, and Royal Carribean cruise ship, the Monarch of the seas that was beautiful, and the Sapphire, was smaller, but packed quite a punch. Most impressed by the balconies.. wow.. ok that was the 6th..came ome and found out we werwe sitting for my sisters kids.. Screech and Cam.. I dont know when it happened.. but I am partial to those 2 kids too.. ug what a sucker (=)) .. so spent most of the day online playing, and relaxing.. then the 8th.. DECEMBER THE 8TH 2008.. the day I turn(ed) 35 . I woke up to my dog Bella telling me i hit snooze too many times.. and she was going to gently remind me to wake up and feed her poor starving self.. so, her delicate almost 80 lb tank -ass planted her paw on my chest, and stood.. whining.. so she lived, and got fed.. when my phone beeped from a new text message, I was hoping, and plesantly surprised it was Sesly.. my baby Sesly. I love hers, wishing me a happy B day. I found my ‘Casual day free pass sticker’ and got ready for work.. now if you think there is NOT a point to this story.. you are WRONG.. long and wordy it may be. but dammit.. as of today, I have lost 22 lbs.. and went down a size.. I fit into a pair of jeans I couldnt fit into for OVER A YEAR. I wore them all day and did not need oxygen ONCE…
no, Seriously
Had my surgery last Thursday the 6th.. my Sinus surgery.. no, no don’t get your damn hopes up.. nothing cosmetic was done.
it was a Quick surgery, the bloody aftermath was a little unexpected, but that healed quickly too.
that was my ‘Big news’ Now onto random crap:
I read the full twilight series and I LOVE it! I REALLY wanted to take Kat to see the movie when it comes out the 21st.. but she is with her Dad, and with everything else going on, I figure not to further aggravate the powers that be, and I can make it up to her. she now has 3 twilight shirts, and the computer is LOADED down with videos and pics of the movie..I myself really want to see it!! she should be pretty easy to shop for for Christmas this year. lol
My Son has found a new game that he really likes, he saved, and sold, and worked for it and now.. he has it. it’s Little Big Planet.. I of course havent played it yet.. he keeps telling me he cant figure out how to play 2 player.. I am SO going to try to play this weekend while he is gone!
My Financial University class is.. well.. going.. I missed the last 2 Saturdays because of a horrid headache (i couldnt take any advil because of the surgery) and then the bleeding, and pain kept me from the next week’’s class.. So this week I really want to and HAVE to go.
Halloween went off without a hitch, had actually a nice quiet evening at the neighbors, they had a Halloween party, and a lot of people didn’t show, so it was nice to sit and catch up with them.
Dogs are good, wonderful, beautiful:
and that’s it.. i am tired, and got another Steamy book I am really interested in reading.. so.. later
Comment or contact me!! I would love to hear from y’all!
Bow Wows and Meows 10.12.08
I attended this year’s Pet Fest/Adoption event Bow Wows and Meows today. and like all other years, it was awesome. I really wish I had my kids this year as I missed the “AWWW… MOM… HOW CUTE… CAN WE GET ONE??”
The atmosphere was relaxed and friendly, and more importantly, Kid AND pet friendly. I should have taken pics, and I really regret not, but here are the pics I DID take.. can you guess what they are of?
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- Hi mom, Thanks :)
So anyway, we had a great time, and I think it is a wonderful cause, and I am looking to possibly volunteer next year. I cannot think of any better cause.. maybe next year, there will be less foreclosures, and more homes for these homeless animals to go to.If not, then everyone i know is getting a damn animal for Christmas.. From Tennessee, to Utah. to Canada.. Happy x mas, here is a puppy.. if you re Jewish, Happy Hanukkah, you get a cat a day. all FIXED no irresponsible breeding..
Ok .. anyway.. I won a Custom Pet Energy Photo from Art on a Wing ok to some it may look Odd, but i am SUPER curious about stuff like this. And I get a pic of my pets.. This may not have been something would have done for myself, but I am diggin I won it. REALLY happy I won it. I am just concerned that it will change my pets.. and hey are all perfect the way they are.
it’s been so LONG since I have written
Ok.. so WHYis it all my posts start with a off handed apology..
anyway it HAS been a while.. and i think some things have changed.. maybe?
Stalker has not called me or tried to contact me since that night.. YAAAAAAAAAAY
Custody is still not resolved.. BOOOOOO
I haven’t adopted any more animals.. YAAAAYY.. yet…BOOOOO lol
I am still employed & have medical insurance.. BIG TIME YAAAYYYY
i am still single.. (a hesitant) woo hoo..
I have been sticking to my ’saving money’ thing YYAAAYYYY
i got sick and was put back on prednisone.. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
i watered my cacti and succulents after 3 weeks.. YYAAAYY
I am still smoking occassionally.. BOOOOOOOOO
I am now the proud single parent of a 14 & SIXTEEN year old.. YAAAYYY.. wait.. um.. ??????
my dogs need a bath BADLY.. STINKY BOOOOOO
i managed to organize, and clean out 3 boxes of crap & a drawer FULL of receipts.. YAAAYYYAAAYYYAYY
STILL do not have a fence for my little pups around the yard.. BOOOOOOOOO
Got some plants together for the Garage sale ….. YAYYYYYYY
we are HAVING a garage sale.. YYYYAAAAYYYYYYY!!!
Aside from that.. I got an offer on my dirt bike.. not a monetary offer.. just a ‘if you want i will take it off your hands’ offer..I am not sure how i feel about that.. I haven’t ridden in a WHILE.. but still.. it’s MY dirt bike I have built up dreams of freedom down an open road & hitting some jumps & CRASHED on that dirt bike.. and i would rather get an enduro Kit & ride it, or have one of my kids ride it.. selfish? I dunno.. it’s paid off & I have to list it as an asset in the custody.. so I am not even sure of it’s Garage sale value, or my truck’s Garage Sale value for that matter.. and I LOOOOVE my truck.. Dodge goes NOWHERE
I am taking a financial course.. and I have spending plans for my saved NOT emergency money.. I was told to have 1000. in emergency money in my bank by a months time.. and to try to get 5,000.00 emergency dollars as an emergency fund ONLY in 3-6 months time.. coming from someone who is not used to saving.. that is a lot of dang cash.. but i am going to try. It’s all for security right?
so.. WHY can’t I just MARRY rich & Secure??….wait.. or one or the other.. crap.. then I would have to date right? .. shit.. Well, i guess it would not be an issue unless the guy I date has kids too, or understands kids.. teenagers.. they take a lot of time and usually some money.. and are TOTALLY worth it. I love my Kids… and since i haven’t dated in YEARS.. I guess i would have to date.. Is it hard? Do they expect you to be smart, funny, charming..I forgot…. and I am SO not good at being something I am not.. are there still Pen Pals? maybe I can start that way….
ANYWAY.. the moral of this Story is I am happy with what I have.. no matter the light it is seen in.. I am Proud SO proud of my kids & a little less proud of my life.. I am doing good.. I still wish i didn’t have the shyness & the fears when it comes to people.. but.. I like my life.. I love my friends.. no petty daily dramas, and I wish i could do more for their contentment at times…. I work & love my job.. I have goals, and plan to see them carried out.. I want to ride my bike to work daily.. And if anyone wants to volunteer to help me come clean up and do some Heavy duty tree trimming, some fencing {not as in swords play, though I have those too} and can help do chores around a house that is neglected, but Loved… That is how I have been.
anyway.. Life as we know it is good.. until the next time.. LOL
Go play your DS..
If It Should Be
IF IT SHOULD BE THAT I GROW WEAK
AND PAIN SHOULD KEEP ME FROM MY SLEEP,
THEN YOU MUST DO WHAT MUST BE DONE
FOR THIS LAST BATTLE CANNOT BE WON.
YOU WILL BE SAD I UNDERSTAND,
DON’T LET GRIEF THEN STAY YOUR HAND.
FOR THIS DAY MORE THAN ALL THE REST,
YOUR LOVE FOR ME MUST STAND THE TEST.
WE’VE HAD SO MANY HAPPY YEARS,
WHAT IS TO COME CAN HOLD NO FEARS,
YOU’D NOT WANT ME TO SUFFER SO,
THE TIME HAS COME TO LET ME GO.
TAKE ME WHERE MY NEED THEY’LL TEND,
AND PLEASE STAY WITH ME UNTIL THE END.
HOLD ME FIRM AND SPEAK TO ME.
UNTIL MY EYES NO LONGER SEE.
I KNOW IN TIME THAT YOU WILL SEE,
THE KINDNESS THAT YOU DID FOR ME.
ALTHOUGH MY TAIL ITS LAST HAS WAVED,
FROM PAIN AND SUFFERING I’VE BEEN SAVED.
PLEASE DO NOT GRIEVE IT MUST BE YOU,
WHO HAS THIS PAINFUL THING TO DO,
WE’VE BEEN SO CLOSE, WE TWO, THESE YEARS
DON’T LET YOUR HEART HOLD BACK ITS TEARS.
FOR I AM NOW IN A BETTER PLACE,
AND WILL BE WAITING TO SEE YOUR HAPPY FACE.
SO WHEN YOU CROSS THAT FINAL BRIDGE,
LOOK FOR ME ….
I’LL BE STANDING NEXT TO THE FRIDGE
-Author Unknown
AAAAHHHHH FRIDAY!!!!!
ok, ok it’s FRIDAY!! August 1st, Girl’s B Day,
So.. for My Daughter’s B-Day, my job is cool enough to let me take the morning off to take my kids out to breakfast. I REALLY LIKE MY JOB!!!
I got my 3rd ‘Official’ Paycheck..
I am OFFICIALLY COVERED BY INSURANCE after almost 9 months!! MEDICAL, Dental, Vision, Life, the F’n WORKS.. and OMG does it feel Fanfuggintastic!!
Katie S should be here tomorrow to start her 2 week long Feeding frenzy.. um I mean her 2 week long visit.. we ARE planning on walking, and riding to feeds.. er.. I mean meals.. definitely more active, my asthma is being a biotch right now, so i am back on the prednisone, but.. I am GONNA be good because I HAVE INSURANCE!!!
so, I am sure I will be posting pics of new cacti.. tantalizing food pics, probably some other landscape, drunken shutter clicks.. etc etc..
Oh, and HEY.. Guess who called!! AGAIN.. AFTER last time.. OMG!! SHUT UP ALREADY!!! I would laugh, but is no a funny…no a funny at all.. and honestly.. how pitiful is it that I NEVER answer.. yet the calls continue..
so, the pets are good…no new pics to post at this time.. note to self: MORE PET PICS..
ok, so I am going to ATTEMPT a new section called ‘new shiny things’ (name pending) as a basic review of all the new shit I have gotten, my reviews, thoughts, suggestions for use.. etc.
So stay tuned!!!
Had it with the past? A funny thing happened..
Everyone has a ‘thing’ in their past, whether it is a habit, a mistake or something stupid they said or did.. maybe even a regret, or a person in their life that is a culmination of all the afore mentioned. These sometimes miserable things slowly fade into your past,and stop being relived with brutal clarity..day after day with feelings of hollow dread, or sickening ‘God what have I done & WHY did I let me do it!??!Bad me Bad ME! WHAT was i thinking’ and other self-defeatest / kickin your own ass, thoughts… Well, they SHOULD fade, they are less in your dreams and on the tip of your tongue when you awaken every morning. you grow, you get over it, you move on, you resolve your feelings, and chalk it up as a learning experience or life lesson.. everyone was (or should have been) young and stupid..some of us more than others
Now..y’all know me.. I have passionate dislikes, some more severe OCD tics, but unless you are an abuser of children or animals or LORD FORBID you mess with my babies..noone gets to mess with my babies…. I don’t hate.. I don’t get the urge to.. I don’t have it in me to hate someone for petty reasons.. life is too short to be tainted by simple hate..have a beer lol
But when someone from the past won’t stay in the past.. what then? Someone was so heartlessly cruel and threatening, went out of their way to be hurtful, and cause pain, and cause potential legal issues..now wants to share their joys with you.. 3 years too late, a LIFETIME too late..Yet the goodness in my soul wants me to be positive, I feel annoyance, borderline awe at the audacity, frustration, Panic & mystification.. and why the hell did they NOT ditch my #.. I ditched theirs.. Were they counting on the fact I would always be there for them. and if so.. what kind of person does that make ME? Is it any wonder why I haven’t put myself into dating, over being a single mom with kids? and WHY DO I care that they called.. because I pity them because it is expected for me to forgive? They undoubtedly chased off anyone who cared about them with their attitude leaving just me, an ex to pat them on the head & say ‘there there’ well.. No.. just No..
I may be fatter than I EVER have been in my life.. but I am not puking or panicked, I know i need to lose weight, be more active, but i don’t feel that people HATE me because I am fat.. and if they do.. fuck ‘em.. I have better people I know, and I know love me, appreciate me, miss me, and more importantly, treat me well. and THEY are good people.. DAMN good people.. and my Children, the reasons my heart beats, my ONLY job in life is to give them a better life. I cannot be more proud of who they have become. Ok, I will not gush on and on about my daughter singing a touching solo in a Talent show at a Jr High, and her remarkable self confidence, and beauty.. and my son’s levelheaded thoughts, and ‘make sense in a world that is ridiculous’ intelligence, and his unfailing finickiness when it comes to friends & who he will be around. Gawd they do me proud..
anyhow.. this is a RANT.. and classified as such.. have a good morning
